Last week, I wanted to laugh a bit, so I revisited George Carlin's quotes.
The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
Embrace your inner dialogue like a VIP brainstorming session with your most trusted advisor—you! So, the next time you're caught talking to yourself, just remember: you're not crazy; you're merely consulting the top expert in You-ology. Plus, it's a guaranteed way always to get your desired answers.
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
Does the same thing happen to people who travel by bike or rollerblade? Does the airplane pilot you are in feel a bit competitive today?
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
These decisions have had quite an impact - from a volcano erupting, the 2008 financial crisis, finding out that smoking kills, a tsunami causing a nuclear disaster, and space shuttle disasters. At least we appear to be learning from them.
We still have a long way to go.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
You would get a story out of it. That's all that I need.
Some people see things that are and ask, Why?
Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not?
Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.
Dedicating time to reflection is still one of the best tools I have found for improving my life. Don't be afraid to do it yourself!
People say, 'I'm going to sleep now,' as if it were nothing. But it's really a bizarre activity. 'For the next several hours, while the sun is gone, I'm going to become unconscious, temporarily losing command over everything I know and understand. When the sun returns, I will resume my life.'
If you didn't know what sleep was, and you had only seen it in a science fiction movie, you would think it was weird and tell all your friends about the movie you'd seen.
They had these people, you know? And they would walk around all day and be OK? And then, once a day, usually after dark, they would lie down on these special platforms and become unconscious. They would stop functioning almost completely, except deep in their minds they would have adventures and experiences that were completely impossible in real life. As they lay there, completely vulnerable to their enemies, their only movements were to occasionally shift from one position to another; or, if one of the 'mind adventures' got too real, they would sit up and scream and be glad they weren't unconscious anymore. Then they would drink a lot of coffee.'
So, next time you see someone sleeping, make believe you're in a science fiction movie. And whisper, 'The creature is regenerating itself.
I'm exploring a different world, where I have the best experiences, yet with one small issue: I can't recall what they are.
